maybe.

As the aisles overflow with candy hearts and Hallmark cards try to encompass all that ‘love’ is and could be, I find myself walking in a daze because I can’t help wondering, if maybe, it’s going to be you.

I slowly walk through the sea of red and wonder if my puzzle piece will fit yours. My edges are so jagged and misshapen and filled with demands and specifications that I know I have no right to make of another human being. But I hold out hope that it’ll be you. You’ll slide right in, fitting like the world’s most complex puzzle piece, making the picture clear.

You’ll become my partner. Adding meaning to the word that I didn’t know before, filling it out and making it round. It’s such a precious thing, the concept of a partner. We’ll resign to the idea of togetherness. We’ll sew patches into each other’s rips and fill in the cracks that appear over the years with warm loving care.

I know that our shapes will evolve over time. Our pieces will weather and new peaks will be formed. If it’s you, I hope you’ll always want to work to smooth my edges so they continue to fit with yours. We’ll look at this jigsaw puzzle of our lives, of our love, and realize that it’s bigger than the both of us but doesn’t function with just one person’s pieces alone.

I’ll always look up at you, from across the table, from the far corner of the room, and marvel at how there is still so very much to see. Will you look at me and see me as an amalgam of everything I have done, everything I mean to you? If my jagged edges blend into yours, will we spend a lifetime acquiring laugh lines and dimples that our shared experiences will carve into each other’s faces?

The lady at the Walgreens counter scans my pack of gum and blister block for my heels (it’s Fashion week after all, people), and I can’t help but look at the cheesy white stuffed animal and wonder if maybe, really, this time, it’s actually going to be you.

Happy Valentine’s Day, You. And to all my wonderful bloggie friends, too!

xoxo